Sad but Still Filled with Joy

Recently my heart was heavy because I was thinking about some of the things I will probably never get to do with Baby David.  You can only imagine how long the list is of things we like to do with our children.  Way up there on the top for me is fishing.  I love to go fishing.  Most of my dates with Aaron consisted of fishing.  I love it.  We've taken our girls so many times and they have grown to love it as well.

Aaron had no idea I had been thinking about not being able to take David fishing.  He had no idea that I was sad that we probably won't ever be able to do that.  He went to WalMart and found a tiny little fishing pole and bought it for Andrew.  While I am so excited to see Andrew use it for the first time, I couldn't help but cry when Aaron showed me this treasure he had found.  He just looked at me in confusion, while I tried to gain enough composure to not lose it completely and to speak.

I finally was able to utter the words, "We won't...baby David".  That was all I needed to say because he understood the rest.  So today I decided we are going to the river (my favorite place to fish).  We are going to take Baby David to mommy's favorite place.  I am excited and sad, filled with peace from The Comforter, and joyful that David will know as much love as possible, even in the womb.

Thank you  Jesus for the strength to enjoy this pregnancy and as much of my son as the Lord will allow us to enjoy.